Australian Tennis champion and author is a SURVIVOR – of domestic violence and cyber bullying. Today she speaks with Sarah Grynberg on A LIFE ON GREATNESS about this, and about how to overcome the physical and emotional scars that are left behind.
As Australia faces a Domestic Violence crisis that covers physical and emotional violence and coercive control, Sarah and Jelena's conversation is one that needs to be listened to.
It's tough, and it's future looking, about survival and about moving on and living a personal life of greatness.
It's the conversation Australian needs to listen to.
Link: HERE
AND Link: https://omny.fm/shows/a-life-of-greatness/jelena-dokic
Joining Sarah Grynberg this week on LiSTNR's A LIFE OF GREATNESS is former world number four tennis player, commentator, author and mental health advocate, Jelena Dokic, who has achieved so much despite being physically and emotionally abused for many years. Jelena is also the author of biographies, Unbreakable and Fearless, all about how she has found the power to grow and thrive. In this heartfelt discussion, Jelena and Sarah discuss why mental toughness doesn't always come easily, they cover the cyber bullying that Jelena has endured, the tools she has used to heal from the abuse of her father, and why choosing to live with an open heart and gratitude has changed her life. If you're looking for strategies and mindset tips to be a more happy and content person, Jelena has them in spades, and will inspire you to overcome any challenge, no matter how heavy it weighs on you.
Sarah Grynberg recently celebrated her 5 year pod-versary and shared her top interview moments: Olivia Newton-John, Jada Pinkett-Smith, Deepak Chopra and more. She's become the requested and sole podcast interviewer in Australia for many visiting international names, people of influence and thought leaders, including Matthew McConaughey, Andrew Huberman, Esther Perel, Mel C (From the Spice Girls), James Clear, Wim Hof and Geena Davis.
TIME STAMPED MOMENTS:
"I will kill you" Tennis Champion, Jelena Dokic's father threatened her life:
00:02:45
Don't you dare say anything to anyone. Don't you dare say anything, because I will kill you. Those words were repeated to you daily by your father.
Jelena Dokic's abusive father became her tennis coach without knowing anything about the sport:
00:07:31
What was his profession?
Uh, he was a truck driver.
And so then he became your coach? Yes. Didn't know anything about tennis?
No, but he learnt a lot along the way. He, uh, he listened to a lot of the coaches. That's where he was quite good. And I would even say quite smart when he came to sport.
Jelena Dokic opens up about domestic abuse at the hands of her father and the reason why people abuse:
00:14:41
It's more about putting the fear in you. So, uh, that's what abuse is about. And then a lot of that with parents in tennis and in sport, it's about control. So it's about controlling you with fear because you are so fearful and you're so scared, not just for your life, but also like, I actually decided to leave and escape when I was 19, but I was still so scared of my father ten years later. Yeah, because they put this massive fear in you with that abuse and with beating you and, uh, with abusing you on different levels, that that's something that creates so much fear and it creates so much trauma that it's something that stays with you pretty much, you know, for a lot of people for your whole life, and it breaks you. So that is the whole reason why they do it. It's all about control. And that's what abusers do. So whether it's abusing your kid or whether it's being with an abusive husband, boyfriend or whatever it might be, the reasons why it's done, it's all the same thing. It's to control you, and it's also for you not to leave them. And because you're so scared.
Jelena Dokic reveals why she gave her abusive father millions of dollars
00:24:32
So when I left home at 19, I thought that if I signed everything over, which was 1920, which was millions already, because I was doing so well from already 1415, I thought if I signed all that over to him, that he would leave me alone, that he would back off, because even though I left home, he would show up at tournaments, he would show up in different countries. He would leave me incredibly threatening and abusive messages to me, coaches that I was working with, people that I was with. It was a really it was really hard to actually find good working relationships as well, because people were afraid and and that was really difficult to be around. I had to hire 24 hour. I had 24 hour round the clock security for months and months. So for me, it continued. It didn't stop just by me leaving and escaping. And that's sometimes what people also don't know about domestic violence and abuse is that when you leave, it is just as hard. Yeah, it is just as scary. You're just waiting for that person to come around the corner. You don't feel safe sleeping at night. I didn't feel safe in hotels. I was just waiting for him. I was just waiting for his face to turn up somewhere. So for me, I knew how motivated he was regarding money and that's all that mattered to him. So I signed everything over to him just in the hope of him leaving me alone and that I can move on. So yeah, that was millions. But unfortunately it didn't work.
00:26:46
Is it worth millions to never be beaten again and to never for him to show up anywhere or scare me or do something? Uh, yeah.
