Lil Bug Love comfort kits support children in time of crisis

When Cindy Barden escaped a violent seven-month relationship in 2016, she and her daughter found themselves at a police station with little more than the clothes they were wearing.

Then 11 years of age, her daughter was too traumatised to sit in another room away from her mother, and was present while Ms Barden relayed the awful details of the abuse she had suffered to investigators.

Months later, while police proceeded with the investigation, she confided to a counsellor that being unable to shield her daughter from the horrific details had added to their trauma.

In the process of regaining her sense of control, she said she began to think about ways she could help others going through the same situation.

"I couldn't imagine what my daughter was feeling while I talked to the police," Ms Barden said.

"The police were amazing - absolutely incredible - but I wasn't able to do anything at the time to help my daughter.

"I thought there must be more we can do to protect other children from having to go through that."

Ms Barden had the idea to put together kits to comfort and distract children in a similar situation, and her counsellor encouraged her to put together a sample kit.

Crestmead Police Station was one of the first stations to trial the idea.

Officer-in-Charge Senior Sergeant Warren Parker said he had met Ms Barden through attending community events and knew of her experiences reporting domestic violence.

"As Officer-in-Charge of a division where we have one of the highest rates of domestic violence in the state, I saw an opportunity to provide this type of service to victims and their children," Senior Sergeant Parker said.

"Initially, Cindy provided colouring-in kits, toys and activity books to Crestmead Station as a trial.

"It was a huge success and then Cindy and I agreed to run a trial of tablets so the kids could play games and draw their attention away from what was happening at the station.

"Crestmead Neighbourhood Watch provided the first tablet as a trial and once again, it was a huge success."

Starting with a grant from Youth Family Service (YFS), Ms Barden began assembling more kits for police to give to children of aggrieved parents as they relayed the details of domestic and family violence or sexual assaults to investigators.

Lil Bug Love was officially launched with 140 kits at Logan Central Police Station on August 1, 2018, and currently supplies 12 police stations from Springwood to Rathdowney with 'Comfort' or 'Distraction' kits.

More than 2,500 children have now received a Lil Bug Love kit.

Senior Sergeant Parker said the kits were in regular use throughout the district.

"I am proud to say that these kits are in every station in the Logan District and are regularly used.

"They have been a fabulous tool in reducing trauma to children when they attend our stations with victims of domestic violence."

Both kits comprise a colouring-in book, blank paper for writing or drawing, pencils and headphones. Lil Bug Love has supplied a device to each station loaded up with noisy games that allows five sets of headphones to connect at the same time.

The Distraction kit also provides a cardboard cut-out of a snail that the child can decorate, while the Comfort kit also includes a pencil case, fabric bag and soft toy in the image of a snail for children who have fled their homes with nothing of their own.

Ms Barden said the snails and the fabric bags were created by members of craft groups who volunteered their skills and materials to support the charity.

"We provide the basic pattern, but they choose the fabric and put their own spin on it.

"The snails are knitted or crocheted and can be made up as male or female or gender neutral. Each one has its own unique personality.

"I chose a snail because to me it's a visual representation of slowing down, which is in contrast to the chaos of having to flee a dangerous situation.

"Also, snails pull themselves into their shells when they are stressed, and that's exactly what our babies are doing."

Ms Barden and her family realised they had little to offer very young children under two years of age, and are currently working on a 'Lil Bub' kit with a snail toy, a dummy and a baby comforter blanket.

She hopes to launch the Lil Bub kit later this year and has a longer-term goal of supplying police stations across the state by the end of 2024.

As well as ongoing support from Queensland Police Service, Logan City Council, and a devoted network of community organisations, Lil Bug Love is funded through donations. Ms Barden can often be found at community events wearing ladybird wings, antennae and a tutu spruiking for donations.

While Lil Bug Love represents an act of empowerment from a victim survivor, Ms Barden recognises the fact that her feelings are often conflicted.

"It's all driven from a mother's guilt because I wasn't able to do anything to help my daughter and I'm not okay with that.

"As my daughter points out however, there are now two and a half thousand kids who don't feel that trauma of hearing the stories repeated over and over.

"My daughter is not only a survivor herself but has blossomed, and is the creative director of Lil Bug Love. She is now 18 and has the confidence to stand up and speak out."

Ms Barden said knowing she could participate in meaningful change was important for her in taking back control of her life.

"When we were in the middle of the Lil Bug Love launch in 2018, a Child Protection officer came and asked me for a kit, as he had someone in the building reporting an offence at that very moment.

"He later told me it had made such a difference to that child. I knew then it was what I needed to do.

"It's up to us as parents to show our kids how we process this trauma and move on with our lives.

"You've still got a choice," she said.