This Valentine's Day, detectives from the Cybercrime Squad are warning people not to fall for the gaslighters, the 'warriors' and the romance scammers of the dating world.
Since January 2024, romance scams have cost Victorians in excess of $30M. Women aged between 60-69 reported a total of over $8M lost and men aged between 20-29 lost over $6.5M.
The highest reporting frequency, though, belongs to people who identify as female aged between 30-39, with over 60 reports from that age group.
Every age bracket was represented, and from January 2024 to date, both males and females reported a total loss in excess of $18M each.
Don't be fooled by anyone looking for a certain type, a shared love of cryptocurrency or someone ten years younger than them - romance scammers will utilise online platforms such as dating apps or social media to connect with their victims, gain their trust, before ultimately obtaining funds from them.
Cruel scammers target victims at their most vulnerable and will often take advantage of people looking for romantic relationships around Valentine's Day.
They'll create fake profiles to make themselves appealing and to play on the emotions of their victim.
They will appeal to their victim's romantic or compassionate side, playing on emotional triggers and expressing strong feelings in a relatively short space of time.
They might spend weeks or months messaging their victim, making them feel like they've formed a genuine connection before shifting the conversation to money or investment or cryptocurrency opportunities.
Once the victim has been reeled in, the scammers will use various deceptive techniques to squeeze money out of them.
Red flags to look out for:
• Love bombing - someone who expresses strong feelings for you in a short amount of time. Scammers will spend time 'grooming' their victims with techniques such as professing their love or sharing emotionally evoking personal stories that pull at the heartstrings of victims
• Someone who tells you an elaborate story - such as a sick child, illness, injury or travel costs - with a sense of urgency as to why they're asking for money or your credit card information
• Someone who says they can't meet in person. The scammer will often say they live overseas or interstate. Reasons can vary, but they'll often say they work overseas for a government agency or the army
• Anyone who asks you to accept a money transfer before further transferring those funds to another account (known as a money mule)
• Gaslighters
Protect yourself by:
• Never providing your financial details to a stranger
• Never sending money to someone you've never met. Be sceptical of urgent requests for money or person information, even if they appear to come from trusted sources
• Trying to avoid emotion when considering requests for money. Take a step back and evaluate the request logically
• Checking for inconsistencies in the person's story - conduct name checks online or reverse image searches to see if the name and/or photo of the person you're speaking to actually belongs to someone else
• Talking to a friend or family member before sending any money
• Trusting your gut. If it seems too good to be true, it probably is
If you think you may have provided account details to a scammer, contact your bank immediately before making a report on ReportCyber. To help others avoid similar scams, you can also report it to ScamWatch.
If you have been affected by an online dating and romance scam, help is available from counselling and support services.
The national online reporting platform for a cybercrime, incident or vulnerability.
The National Anti-Scam Centre has set up Scamwatch to support awareness and reporting of scams. Visit for more information, advice and to report different scams.
• IDCARE
Help with advice on scams that involve stealing your identity. This free Australian and New Zealand service can help you limit the damage and recover from the scam. Counselling and support services are also available. Call 1800 595 160.
• Financial Assistance Scheme (FAS)
You may be eligible for financial help through the Financial Assistance Scheme (FAS). Help can be for counselling, medical expenses, and loss of earnings.
You should report any cyber abuse (regardless of your age), or image-based abuse to the eSafety Commissioner. They also investigate cyber bullying and help you deal with online abuse.
Quotes attributable to Detective Sergeant John Cheyne, Cybercrime Squad:
"These staggering figures could represent a lifetime of savings for many victims, and these are reflective only of those who have made a report to police. That's the devastating reality of romance scams in 2025, they have the potential to be financially crippling.
"Importantly, no age group was immune - romance scammers target us all, so we're urging the community to remain vigilant online.
"Protect your information, be aware of who you're talking to and importantly, never give money or your financial details to a stranger."
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